


Vacant

by klancingthecube (hazyamethyst)



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender, klance - Fandom
Genre: (kinda), But mostly sweet, Langst, M/M, Not So Oblivious Keith, Pining Lance (Voltron), he really doesn't trust these BoM dudes, he's a boy in love that's just very Worried about Keith and where his choices may end up taking him, klance, lowkey Jealous Lance, poem, rewatching s4 gave me all the feels, season 4 compliant
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-03
Updated: 2018-02-03
Packaged: 2019-03-12 17:48:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,210
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13552488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hazyamethyst/pseuds/klancingthecube
Summary: Who do you carry the torch for, my young man?Do you believe in anything?- Brand New, 'The Archer's Bows Have Broken'.Lance writes poems.Sometimes they are about a boy that's a zillion galaxies away- at least that's what it feels like.





	Vacant

I think lately  
my brain is playing tricks on me,  
my eyes fix, unblinking,  
stare icy enough to be accused of  
glaring, ha, at _what_? I don't listen,  
they back off,  
I'm  
always somewhere else now,  
somewhere far,  
and when I short-circuit like this it’s right back at you, or your ghost,  
face a blur, voice static and cracking, fierce as thunders,  
_You gettin’ scared?_  
I know it feels as if it's coming down out here,  
finally,  
I can breathe and you'll be wet,  
complaining all the way back, yes, getting on my nerves  
by way of pouts and huffs and I really want to just,  
if it were, _we_ ,  
which is not, never was,  
I liked you all the more,  
when you quit struggling against smiles,  
in some daydreams, maybe, we were carefree and  
you were there,  
warm and solid,  
when I leaned into your arm, then shoulder.

  
  
After midnight  
it's the saddest to walk through halls too long,  
in the silence, in the cold of the metal  
that we're trapped in,  
you're in through one ear and out the other,  
you faded even after the fire and explosions were dealt with,  
you faded behind a sword so lethal, so you,  
you faded when it was my turn,  
put up  
invisible walls I couldn’t knock on,  
tap or sing through,  
like I did the ones of your room,  
it’s like doors and fluorescent lights alone couldn’t keep you contained,  
after you got a taste of distance, of the never-ending vastness,  
of the unknown,  
of the foreign places no one seems to come back from,  
there are missions, they said,  
greater than your one-point-seventy-eight meters,  
your fiery temper they praised, openly,  
as if planning not to stomp on it first chance,  
in the name of discipline,  
they may have glossed over it, who’s to judge?,  
you’d be hooked in time, and withering in accord but  
first impressions gotta’ be lasting, draw you in,  
secrecy meant no answers to your questions, yet,  
some shushed you with whispers  
while others rattled on about all the knowledge there is, all the blood to shed  
for causes just and fair,  
yours,  
too,  
there’s no shortage of dangers to seek and  
you’ve got only so much force  
and limbs,  
_sanity?_  
  
It will surpass you, they promised, not to come back,  
there’s trust to be had in the greater good,  
pride in being a number,  
an 'X', a shadow of a face behind a mask,  
I might have zoned out for the duration of the rest,  
maybe knowing,  
maybe for a moment considering to grab your hand,  
and pull at it,  
race you to the lions, or the kitchen,  
sing back at you the wrong lyrics to your silly hardcore songs,  
anything to get your attention and hold it, rile you up enough,  
show them that you’re above all _young,_  
and it’s all kinds of perverse to dangle sharp shiny promises and cutting truths,  
before those a little reckless, a little too willing to act,  
acquainted better with weapons than people,  
out of fear, necessity or chance,  
hands more often closed in fists,  
and arms crossed,  
gaze set forward as if it’s all there is,  
survival and living to fight a thousand tomorrows,  
when in reality hands could be idle and without pourpose, held,  
arms snaked around waists, playful,  
pressing tight not to hurt,  
immobilize or overpower,  
but because it feels nice,  
and it’s simple,  
so, so simple,  
you probably wouldn’t believe it.  


Yeah, it’d be real cool,  
see,  
to be listened,  
dubbed other than dramatic,  
_“Don’t mind Lance, we‘ll_ _always s_ _upport you,_  
_it’s your choice”_  
Shiro offers instead, casually,  
like he’s done anything  
other than shut you down, lately, tell you off,  
barking _No_ ,  
_Keith, no,_  
_Don’t,_  
_Wrong,_  
_Stop!,_  
still, it means the world to you, his approval,  
so you just nod,  
and  
go. ~~~~  


Tears dry  
by the time you decide to rob me of well-earned rest,  
the mattress dips where you choose to sit  
next to of one of my –thankfully- not sprawled legs,  
caution thrown to the wind you shake me,  
_Lance!,_  
_Come on!,_  
you’re grouchy and as random as ever,  
you want to borrow a _thing_ , apparently,  
a light sleeper, me,  
can’t listen,  
too out of it for once,  
hand over the tablet I fell asleep on,  
felt smacked back on the head with it,  
soft- _ly_  
enough to be barely aware  
of who, why, what,  
_you_ ,  
smoothing my hair back into something less of the mess  
I got it in,  
with my nervous ruffling and sharp twisting,  
my own comb, now in your clueless hands  
taken  
or filched, more like,  
from my night table,  
it’s nice and unlike anything we’ve ever done,  
quiet,  
it stretches for what can be seconds,  
hours,  
months,  
a lazy blink tells me it finds home in your pocket,  
I didn’t agree to it, _‘You can’t just! Hey! Keith!’_  
but you can,  
you’re sneaky and fast on your feet,  
you stand,  
mumbling something that sounds a lot like ‘ _We’ll see’_ ,  
and all I feel is I don’t want to,  
door whooshing closed I’m alone,  
lonely, solo,  
thinking, _damn_ , so much for trying to one-up you,  
that same door saw us stumble in drunk, after silly dares,  
saw me dragging you in to play videogames,  
kick you out when losing, or  
you stomping in high-strung after battles  
to wind down together and reflect on close calls, lay blames on each other,  
shout a little ‘cause it’s cathartic  
and  
kinda’ our thing.

  
  
Is it selfish to call this a draw?  
An impasse?  
You just really outdid yourself, Keith,  
this time it does feel like there can't be no catching up,  
I'm stumped,  
it’s  
funny,  
though,  
how the back of my eyelids stay  
burnt with spots the color of your eyes,  
because they’re pretty and I caught a glimpse too many,  
it’s the prelude to dreams,  
until  
it is not  
black can’t be hold off,  
when it’s just wisps of memories,  
not days old but months,  
I might be caught someday,  
off-guard,  
not moving on,  
not falling back into new routines,  
not buying that you’ll reach out when you can  
but  
faking it for their sake,  
big time ol’ faking, A+,  
_the bestest of the best,_  
for Voltron’s, for the universe’s,  
I’ll smile and blink my eyes into something less dead,  
sneak into your room by accident,  
lock the door by mistake,  
end up somewhere vaguely familiar,  
between hard pillows and black clothes someone never cared to fold,  
I’ve no idea why they scatter the floor,  
as if tossed around in a fit by a child,  
I’m too exhausted to do other than collapse on the unmade bed,  
stare at the ceiling  
wonder if everyone is doing all right tonight,  
bleeding out, captured, slaughtered, or slaved,  
maybe just okay,  
drawn to places that changed and they can’t pinpoint why,  
even as they hold on to the things there,  
wrap themselves up in them until the air smells faintly  
more like it should,  
hoping it’d make a difference, the pain,  
and their wishes whispered low into wrinkled fabric.  
  
  
Red,  
as you might expect,  
is well beyond all denial  
her growls never waver,  
day or night, she’s there,  
loud.  
Headstrong through her fury.  
Comforting.  
Warm.  
  
I lose sleep too easily, anyway.

**Author's Note:**

> [tumblr!](https://klancingthecube.tumblr.com/)
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> comments/kudos make me go all ٩(๑> ₃ <)۶♥


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